Top TEN most Over-rated Video Game Characters

Posted: April 1, 2011 in Games
Tags: , , , , , , , ,


Sick of hearing about a certain character over and over again? Tired of people yelling in your ear how awesome this or that character is? If so then I feel your pain. I’ve comprised a list of characters in desperate need of being shelved for a bit so we can have a little breathing room from the many ranks of the overrated.

10. Tim (Braid)

Obsessive psychopath or passionate, worried boyfriend? However you interpret Braid’s story, it’s hard to argue that Tim is actually any sort of viable character. Without real, direct input from Tim himself, he’s hard enough to relate to, and as the game was full of annoyances on its own, I struggle to see how Tim to this day still receives so much praise. I can get down with the indie developer support, but be real here — he’s really no more of a character than the silhouetted boy of Limbo.

9. Talim (Soulcalibur)

Never before has a Soulcalibur character annoyed me to the point of not wanting to play online matches because opponents love little, innocent Talim. Not only is she similar to an RPG protagonist’s helpless, cherubic little sister, but she speaks in the third person. Unless you’re playing with a button-masher, every match faced against this pure little girl is nerve-wracking. She’s a speedy little cuss, and dual-blades don’t make matters much better. She grates on the nerves with her angelic personality and “never give up” spirit. Now, Taki on the other hand…

8. (Miranda Lawson, Mass Effect 2)

I’m unsure why so much buzz surrounds this femme fatale. She may be the “perfect woman,” but in reality she’s quite dull. Sure, she’s got a killer figure, but while you’re busy drinking it in, it’s easy to overlook her behavior — that of, in many instances, an ice queen. Let’s not forget her involvement with Cerberus, which is in my mind similar to notorious xenophobe Ashley Williams. Frigid, arrogant, and filled with sarcastic remarks, it’s difficult to transform her into a likeable (or interesting) character in my book, pre-relationship or otherwise. When you’ve got Tali, Morinth, Thane, Jack, or any of the rest of the crew waiting for you to unlock their secrets, this human vixen simply pales in comparison. Despite a fantastic performance from Yvonne Strahovsky, Miranda continued to bore me throughout my journey to the galaxy’s furthest reaches. And you better believe I took Jack’s side in that momentous argument. Miranda won’t be seeing the light of day in my Mass Effect 3 playthrough.

7. Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic the Hedgehog series)

Though I’m a huge Sonic fan, the ‘fastest thing alive’ hit his stride years ago. Sonic Colors was a workable comeback, but poor old Sonic’s been rode hard and put up wet. He may have been all that years ago, but now he’s a tired old rodent who needs to kick off his trademark red kicks and have a bit of a rest. The cheesy, peppy, do-gooder attitude, and the speed has been doing him a lot of damage, and I think we all know it’s time for a break.

6. Kratos (God of War series)

Don’t get me wrong — I like to cleave through baddies as the newest fledgling God of War, but Kratos is, well, kind of a jerk. He may be responsible for some truly heinous crimes, and we see hints at true repentance and guilt for his wrongdoing, but…he never truly gets it, does he? All I really know of Kratos beyond his past sins is that he likes orgies, bloodshed, and being angry. Okay, honestly, I know a little more than that, but as much as I like the Ghost of Sparta, he’s not the action hero he’s cracked up to be. Wait for it, I am just getting warmed up, this guy is just a crazy hard headed Spartan who calls himself the God of war. Well I have nothing against him except the fact that he is always angry and saying that he will kill Zeus who apparently is his father but lets look at it this way in the end of the part 3 of the series, he was supposed to give all the powers he got to Athena who is supposed to be his sister but takes out himself when he finds out that he is the last bad guy. common!! that’s just shallow.

5. Sackboy (LittleBigPlanet)

LittleBigPlanet is certainly a creative and engaging platformer. There’s no disputing that. And I was anxious to see what adorable little creature I’d be playing as when popping the game into my PlayStation 3. When greeted with a brown ball of yarn known only as a “Sackboy,” I was disappointed. The vacant smile, dead black eyes, and annoyingly cheery little bugger actually isn’t that adorable at all. Sure, you can dress them up in plenty of cutesy outfits so they resemble some of your favorite Sony figureheads, but take it all away and they’re not so hot…certainly not mascot-worthy. Crash Bandicoot revival, anyone? Crash bandicoot is better looking than this piece of shit called sack boy.

4. Marcus Fenix (Gears of War series)

You don’t get much more manly than Fenix, flagship protagonist of Gears of War. Lancers are amazing and all, and Marcus is your bro if you want a side of humor with your rugged no-neck man’s man, but as far as third-person leads go, we can do so much better. We’re not sure how his character will evolve in Gears of War 3, but dear old Marcus is the epitome of male fantasy, and you needn’t look far to see that, so it should be obvious why I doubt his uniqueness in a world of plenty of other amazing characters, like sam fisher and solid snake of splinter cell and metal gear solid respectively.

3. Master Chief (Halo series)

Now, I’m no Halo hater, but you don’t get any more generic than Master Chief, the pinnacle of the entire Halo franchise. Sure, we know enemies run in terror wherever he rears his shiny sage-colored helmet, but beyond reading into the Halo lore propagated via books, tie-in features, and supplemental materials, Master Chief is rather flat. That of course doesn’t stop him from being the center of today’s gaming world. I’ll openly admit I’ve oohed and ahhed at his rumbling one-liners and narrow escapes, but his everyman persona is nothing to lose your marbles over.

2. Lara Croft (Tomb Raider series)

She may have won the hearts of plenty of gamers with her then-revolutionary “assets” (insert eyeroll here), and as a female protagonist I do appreciate her contributions, but as far as characters go, there’s little to Lara beyond guns, quips, and some smooth moves. Other than her trademark tank top and short shorts, Lara’s your plain-jane everywoman. Really, she could be anyone. It’s disappointing to me that most of her notoriety seems to stem from those interested only in how many pixels comprise those dangerous curves, but I can certainly see why. There’s not much else to her when you strip away the exterior. For that reason, I’m looking forward to the upcoming Tomb Raider reboot, where we hopefully see Lara’s character improve. Here’s the thing any woman can play lara croft this particular lara is just too notorious to be liked…

1. Princess Peach (Mario series)

Here’s a character I’m sure you’re all familiar with: Princess Toadstool, or Peach. Ever since she’s been crawling around in her little pink diapers, Bowser has been stealing her away from Mario and the Mushroom Kingdom, and we’ve been eating it up. Well, I’m not going to dwell too much on Bowser’s reasoning behind kidnapping one woman for years in succession. I don’t think I really want to know his innermost desires. What I do know is that Peach is fairly useless beyond her ability to bake cakes and get kidnapped. She’s the epitome of damsel style, with her cotton candy pink dress, parasol, and flowing blonde hair. Sure, she’s gorgeous, but I do have to wonder what Mario sees in her to risk his life an astronomical amount of times just to keep her safe. Beyond the fact that Peach is too incompetent to escape Bowser’s terrifying grasp, what does she even do for the inhabitants of Mushroom Kingdom? I’m willing to bet she’s just a figurehead. What is a human princess doing ruling over mushroom-people, anyway? Granted, Peach has had a few instances where she is actively trying to take part in preserving the good of the kingdom or the world, such as in Super Paper Mario, where she actually becomes a playable party member. It is quite notable as well that she appeared in her very own (albeit very easy) platformer, Super Princess Peach, in which she endeavors to save the Mario Bros. for once.

Okay, Peachy. I’ll give you the platformer that you starred in and the few instances you decided you should play a little harder to get, but that still doesn’t excuse you from a history of helplessness, nor your being completely overrated.

Authored by Don ( kelaway05@gmail.com)
Don is one of our admins here at “La Critique” and runs his own blog which is on Movies. His blog is @ http://www.kelaways-planet.blogspot.com

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Comments
  1. Iceman says:

    Lovely angle and perspective to this. personally agree with the Fratos and Lara Croft parts. I mean what’s the fuss with that guy anyways?!…and the one on Peach was totally hilarious! good one!

  2. DON says:

    this is cool…

  3. blacklola says:

    Thanx for your feedback, Iceman

  4. chuck says:

    regardless. i am still feeling Kratos. I think hes one of the best characters of all time..but that princess just drives me nuts. “sorry but our princess is in another castle” WTF!!?? so what have i been jumping around like i had a hot potato in my pants for??
    did you know if you slow the image of mario down at that moment. you can catch him giving the little toad man the finger.. true story!

  5. DON says:

    to me he is just a sad guy…

  6. chingaling says:

    nice article… I agree wit u on most of these characters, all but one…Kratos. His character’s storyline is about the most well-rounded i’ve ever seen on video gaming. U say he is “a crazy hard headed etc, who CALLS HIMSELF D GOD OF WAR”?? if u hav played and ended all d GOW series both on ps and psp u would know dat his rage started wen ares tricked him into killing his wife and daughter and he he bcame d GOW not by choice but bcus the olympian gods made him so. And d reason 4 KILLING zeus was bcos he kept his mother trapped and hide the existence of his brother deimus from him. Zeus also made sure he had no option but to kill his mother to keep her 4rm killing him (play GOW: ghost of sparta on psp). Kratos was btrayed by every1 he ever trusted, ares, zeus, the titans, and athena, so forgiv him 4 being a “crazy spartan. U might wanna replace him with dante (DMC series)… Now there’s an overrated fella……

    • blacklola says:

      Lovely perspective Chingy! I feel you die… But my fav game character is Splinter Cell’s Sam Fisher! Now there’s a honed killing machine.
      Thanx for your feedback

    • DON says:

      Chingalin, believe me, I have played the game times without number and finished it on all difficulty levels. I still maintain the fact that he is just hard headed. If you have played devil may cry, you will agree with me that being angry all the time will not solve any problem. It’ll only create more. Check out the character called DANTE or better still check out NERO in Devil may cry 4. I am sure if you liked Kratos, you will fall for Nero if not Dante. Thanks for your feedback though

  7. chingaling says:

    dante might not b an “angry all d time” guy like kratos, u say bcos it creates more problems, well as a hardcore gamer u shouldn’t expect an easy ride. No matter d probs kratos handles them. I mean he did single handedly kill ALL d gods, ALL TITANS, Medusa, persephone, the sisters of fate, thanatos(the god of death). He did all dis without ‘devil trigger’, ‘holy water’, and all those other fetish materials dante carries around… And many many more bad guys… D guy is nt only nt overrated, he’ll eat dante 4 desert.

  8. There’s none so blind as they that won’t see.

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